


Alice's Melancholy

by Ciryes



Category: Touhou Project
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-05-14 21:43:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14777757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ciryes/pseuds/Ciryes
Summary: A routine ingredient hunt becomes more interesting when Alice Margatroid meets a youkai doll, and decides to take her in.





	1. Chapter 1

Alice Margatroid's day began as it always did - surrounded by her dolls. As soon as she awoke to the dappled sunlight pouring into her bedroom window through the gaps in the Forest of Magic's trees, her entourage of ever-helpful dolls had already begun to assemble her outfit for the day. With a yawn and a moment to stretch, the puppeteer climbed out of bed, put her arms out, and in seconds, the little wooden helpers were unbuttoning her pajamas and gently tugging her day-clothes onto her body. Once she was dressed, she went into the washroom to rinse her face, while one of the tiny servants ran a brush through her bedraggled hair. By the time she was finished tending to her appearance, the dolls were already pouring tea and setting out breakfast. With a quiet 'thank you' to the little figures, the magician began to eat, and each one gave a small, polite bow before hurrying off to complete their other assigned chores. Some moved to dust the furniture, others wet cloths at the sink to clean off the windows and mirrors, while more searched for anything else out of order around the house. Not that there was much, Alice was nothing if not an incredibly meticulous person.

Gensokyo's magicians facilitated their lives in various ways with their magic, and for Alice, it was all about her dolls. Her interest in them preceded her interest in magic; even as a child she'd cared for them, painted them, repaired them, given each and every one their own name and significance, and her fascination had naturally carried over to her magical studies. She was easily the region's most dedicated dollmaker, even before any enchantments went into her creations. Each doll hand-crafted, hand-painted, and dressed in home-sewn clothing with nothing but the utmost patience and admiration. With her finely-refined addition of rudimentary magical intelligence, the dolls became tools that were as useful as they were beautiful, and Alice hadn't any reason to worry about housework for the past few decades.

"You two, little Shanghai, and Kyoto. Would you please fetch me my basket and coat? Thank you kindly."

There were, of course, some jobs that the magician could only perform herself. The spells and enchantments that went into her dolls required rare ingredients from every corner of Gensokyo, and keeping a fresh supply was quite important. Alice was constantly making dolls - many of her combat-oriented ones were expendible, for one thing, but the eventual damage all of them inevitably sustained meant that she was constantly creating them. Wood and lacquer, paint and thread, these things were easily obtainable from shops in the Human Village. Rare and magical herbs, fairy-wing dust, miasmic nectar, spirit dew - those rarer ingredients required the discerning eye of a magician who'd been gathering them for years. And, in the case of the wing-dust, someone with the combat prowess to beat up a bunch of innocent fairies.

Alice's forays into the wilds were a daily chore, but one she enjoyed nonetheless. Wandering through nature, accompanied by dolls, she truly felt at home. Today's shopping list of ingredients-to-gather included a rare mushroom she'd have to hope Marisa hadn't snatched all of already, river-reeds, and lily-of-the-valley toxin. The first of those items could be found in the forest where she lived, so her first destination was quite nearby.

Alice's going-out dolls were more well-armed than her at-home dolls - swords, lances, shields, even suiciding exploding dolls made up her versatile and adorable armory. Each of the weaponized dolls was fully autonomous, but could also be manually controlled via the use of magical string. With her tactical mind and fine craftsmanship, few youkai could stand in the magician's way in a battle. Today, ten soldiers, ten defenders, five archers and five bombers were accompanying her. The mushrooms were gathered without incident - while the forest was full of threats, the native magicians were mostly ignored by the youkai and fairies who were used to their presence at this point. River-reeds were most commonly found in the area around Genbu Marsh, and the kappa were very friendly towards local magicians. Alice hadn't needed her dolls at all yet, but the reason she'd brought the small army with her today was for the third ingredient.

Lilies-of-the-valley were a mildly poisonous plant, but only the flowers located at a certain hill produced a concentrated enough toxin to be of use in spells or construction - the handiwork of a youkai of poison rumored to live there. Alice had never been there before - the poison was for a new variant of gas-grenade doll, and this was the first time she'd ever needed it - and so she'd made sure to overcompensate for any possible threat.

By the time she arrived at the hill in question, she was already glad she did - one wouldn't think a flower field could ever be described as ominous, but the purple haze of toxic mist drifting through the white petals in the dim light of evening gave off an aura of unease. Still, Alice had come here for a reason, and she wasn't about to let a creepy atmosphere send her home without her precious poison. Her worker dolls began to dutifully pick the flowers, as did Alice, the plants being placed in her basket as they were gathered, gradually filling it up with the pale suzuran bells. Her work went uninterrupted, the field seemingly empty, until a light voice echoed through the mist.

"A traveller comes to this hill of lost things. Does she want to die?"

The magician's eyes narrowed as she stood up and scanned the vicinity. The thick haze shrouded the horizon, and whomever had spoken. Her dolls immediately dropped what they were doing and moved into a defensive formation.

"I hadn't planned on it, actually," the magician replied, still searching for a source. "I'm here on business."

"Interesting. When people visit this place, it's either to leave something behind, or to die. Maybe you're here to rid yourself of something unwanted?"

"Quite the opposite." Alice finally spotted a dark silhouette among the clouds, and focused her gaze on it. "I'm here for the flowers that grow here. Though if someone's going to make trouble for me, I could always use a good fight."

The response to that was a series of cold, empty giggles, and the figure stepped out into view. A minuscule figure with pretty blonde hair tied with a silk ribbon, pretty red clothes covered in ribbons and frills, she may not have seemed threatening at all. Yet her eyes, cold and blue, seemed empty of any love or empathy. Just seeing the girl's hateful gaze sent a chill down Alice's spine.

"A cocky magician steps into this place of poison and death, and expects to leave with her life? That's silly. Isn't it silly, Su-san?" There is no response, but the youkai acts as if the flowers had responded regardless. "Do you hear? They want to steal your life away. If you stay here for too long, it'll be your end."

"I'm quite happy with my chances, actually." Alice replied. "Shanghai, Hourai, battle formations." The dolls she called to pulled out their weapons, and began to hover around the magician in an organized swarm. This, however, seemed only to interest the hostile youkai more than anything.

"...Interesting. So you fight by making dolls do your bidding. How very typical of tool-users like you. Very well. Once your poisoned corpse is eaten by the soil, they will be emancipated!"

Alice didn't have time to ponder what that last sentence meant, because with her last words, the youkai had already begun to cast forth a spray of gleaming magical bullets, and so she wasted no time in moving to avoid them. Despite the small youkai's appearance, her attack immediately gave Alice a glimpse of her power - the rumors of a dangerous youkai inhabiting this hill weren't kidding, that was for sure. Still, Alice was not about to lose. As soon as she had an opening, she directed her dolls to fly forward, aiming colored lasers at the target. One grazed the girl's dress, leaving a singe-mark, but she successfully wormed her way out of the rest.

Both participants had traded attacks, and in the brief calm that followed, the opposing youkai took a moment to inspect the damage to her clothing, before turning her gaze back to Alice. "I see you're a cut above the humans and weak youkai that usually come here. No matter, this poison will be your end, and your dolls will be mine."

In the poison youkai's hand was a spell card. At the end of her sentence, it began to glow as she declared it.

"Poison Sign "Melancholy Poison"."

More bullets, but this time accompanied by clouds of violet gas. It was clear that this spell expected Alice to navigate through the danmaku patterns while dealing with the choking poison, and so she took a deep breath before it reached her. The difficulty wasn't impossible to deal with at first, but eventually, she did need air, and drawing a breath nearly caused her to choke. The sickly-sweet mist in the air stung her eyes and hurt her lungs, and the effect on her ability to dodge the oncoming bullets was noticeable. Many of them grazed her clothing and her skin, leaving burn marks on the fabric and her flesh. Still, wincing through the pain, she made it to the end of the spell.

"See, you're already falling victim to my poison," the small youkai giggled. "Soon the toxin will course through your veins, bringing about your painful, miserable end. Don't resist."

The acid and vitriol in her voice was incredible. Alice couldn't remember battling a youkai filled with this amount of verbal (or literal) venom, much less one who seemed so pleased with herself all the while. That sweet, singsong voice was more haunting the more she listened to it. Still, she had to focus on winning. Alice directed her blade-wielding dolls forward, and they charged the poison youkai in formation. Some were avoided, but others hit clothing, and one even managed to jab the girl's leg, causing her to wince. Her eyes were suddenly filled with rage, and she shot Alice a glare as sharp as her doll's swords.

"You turn your tools against one of their own," she said, gazing at the dolls around her. "Force them to fight for your amusement, while you remain safe from harm at their expense. They're expendible. That's all you see them as."

Alice had never seen an opponent so interested in her dolls. Between this and the earlier 'emancipation' concept, she was a little confused. What had she said, though? 'One of their own'? Was this...

"Oh," Alice said, realization dawning on her. "Tools... you're a tsukumogami. Of... a doll?" The girl's eyes widened in surprise.

Rather than an answer, however, Alice got an attack. The doll youkai began to twist in the air, arms moving as if directing a choir, and shortly after, the many flowers surrounding Alice began to fire off projectiles towards her. The magician rose into the air, gaining altitude to buy herself more time, but the attack from below was unconventional, and threw her off-guard. The youkai almost appeared to be manipulating the flowers themselves, although considering they were full of poison, Alice wouldn't have been surprised. Once she gained her bearings, the pattern wasn't difficult to get around. What the magician was really dreading was being faced with the enemy's poison again - it hadn't been a pleasant experience. She ordered her dolls to charge once more, surrounding the poison youkai. In desperation, the girl declared another spell card, the resulting burst of energy disabling the dolls mid-charge.

"Confusion "Into Delirium"!"

Shortly after the spell activated, a blast of toxic gas and bullets exploded outward, and Alice barely had time to react before she was choking on the gas and barely dodging the bullets. Before she was even able to recover from the first barrage, a second blast followed. The poison haze was quickly making her lightheaded, and the barrage didn't let up. This tsukumogami was small, but made for a very formidable opponent nonetheless. If her attack kept up like this, Alice might actually lose. In desperation, she ordered her explosive dolls into the maelstrom of poison and light.

In that moment, a great amount of things happened in one moment. Alice was struck in the chest by a stray bullet she hadn't seen behind a cloud of gas, a great flash of light came from the center of the attack, ending the spell with a flash of light, someone cried out, and Alice hit the ground, hard.

When she came to, the air had cleared slightly, and as she sat up, she noticed the tsukumogami sitting quietly in the field. Her clothes were singed and torn, hair a mess, skin covered in dust. In her tiny, delicate hands, she clutched the ruined body of one of Alice's exploding dolls. It was a strange scene, and she didn't quite know how to react. She slowly moved towards the youkai, and when she got closer, noticed that she was crying.

"Um... are you alright?" the magician asked, after a moment of quietness. Alice didn't think she'd have caused that much harm. They had been using the spell card system, after all.

No response. Her eyes didn't move from the broken doll in her hands.

"So... you're a doll, too, then? I've never seen a youkai doll like yourself before. It's interesting."

"Don't."

Alice's eyes widened at the first word from the girl since their battle. "Don't what?"

"Don't pretend you care about dolls like us all of a sudden. They're toys to you, aren't they? Trinkets to help you fight. Slaves to help you work. You don't know a thing about their thoughts, their reasons, their suffering." The doll's hands closed even tighter around the smaller, unmoving doll.

"Actually, I can't think of anything I care for more than my dolls," Alice replied. Her answer earned a doubtful look, but the little doll youkai did seem vaguely interested, so Alice took that as a sign to continue. "Each one, I make myself, with careful precision, all of my skill, and all of my heart. There are hundreds, and yet each one is a careful product of my love." She reached for one of the Shanghai dolls surrounding her, and held it close to her chest. "I treasure them dearly."

The doll youkai's eyes turned towards the doll in her hands. "Not these ones, clearly."

"Even those ones," Alice said. "After the battle, I gather them up, take them home, repaint them, refill them, untangle their hair and restitch their dresses-"

"Stop, stop." The girl shook her head angrily. "Stop acting like you understand. Nobody cares about us. Nobody will ever care about me. If anybody cared, I wouldn't have festered here for a hundred long years without anybody even stopping to pick me up. I'm not stupid, you know. You're a tool-user, you don't actually care about me, you just want this back. Don't insult me by pretending you think I'm anything but someone's old trash."

The amount of anger in her words was only matched by the amount of pain, and Alice wasn't sure how to respond for a long while. Still, she felt the need to say something.

"Actually, you're... one of the most interesting beings I've ever seen."

Another glare from the doll youkai. "I said stop, didn't I?"

"No, no, I mean it. I've been magically animating dolls for decades, but a fully sentient doll, well, that's something else. I've been trying to do that myself for a long time, but I could never quite achieve it. You, I... I feel I could learn a lot from you. You're something extraordinary. Beautiful, really."

This elicited an unusual reaction from the doll youkai. She'd never heard that many compliments at once. In fact, she'd never heard compliments. Part of her wanted to hope, but part of her knew that hope only led to pain. She responded to the strange claims of affection by looking away.

"Do you have a name?"

The youkai was quiet for a moment, but didn't see any harm in answering.

"Medicine. Medicine Melancholy."

"And you live here on this hill?"

"Yes."

"By yourself?"

"...Yes."

"For how long?"

Medicine was quiet. While lacking an answer, the silence was all Alice really needed to know.

"People don't come here often, do they?"

"They don't," Medicine replied, "And when they do, it's never for anything good. There's poison here, youkai here. This Hill of the Nameless is where people go to leave behind that which they no longer care for."

"You're just going to stay here?" Alice asked, a hint of worry creeping into her voice.

"There isn't anywhere I belong." the doll youkai answered blankly. "At least here, I don't have to deal with humans... often, at least."

A possibility had been creeping around in Alice's mind for the past few minutes, and she finally decided to voice it.

"Would..."

A curious look from the doll youkai.

"Would you perhaps like to come back with me?"

This earned Alice a rather incredulous look. "With you," Medicine repeated, as if to ensure she'd heard that right.

"With me," Alice repeated. "You don't have to stay. But I think it'd do you some good to leave this gloomy place, if only for a little while. I could prepare us some dinner, maybe give you a warm place to stay the night. I'm often surrounded by dolls, but I rarely get to have the company of a doll like yourself."

There were a hundred thousand ways this could have led to more pain, more suffering, but it wasn't as if Medicine's life could have gotten any worse at this point. Each day was so much of the same that if it weren't for sleeping, the passage of time might have lacked any distinctiveness entirely. This magician seemed to be genuinely interested in her, for whatever odd reason, and Medicine was too curious to pass up this opportunity for good food and a comfortable rest for once.

With an unenthusiastic shrug, she replied, "...Sure, I guess."


	2. Chapter 2

By the time Alice and Medicine arrived back at the magician's house in the Forest of Magic, the sun was beginning to set. By this time, Medicine would usually have been laying on a bed of flowers somewhere, trying to sleep so that she didn't have to remain awake and alone in the dark of night. But now, she was going with a stranger to her house in an unfamiliar part of Gensokyo. The promise of warm food and a comfortable bed didn't help the sense of unease that had slowly been building within her. Medicine Melancholy was not one to put herself in the trust of other people; there was nothing she hated more than vulnerability, and following this magician home, she felt nothing but.

"We're here," Alice announced as the two entered a forest clearing, where, past a nice wooden fence, a quaint cottage stood among the trees. Painted bright white, with a neat porch and little tower situated off to the side, it didn't exactly give off the very threatening look Medicine was expecting a house in the middle of the woods to, and she was slightly thankful for that.

"Once we're inside, I'll start dinner," Alice said, reaching into her bag for a shiny brass key, and slid it into the lock on the front door. "I had my dolls start on a stew with the leftover vegetables I had, so I hope that sounds alright." As the magician stepped inside, Medicine stopped at the door. Hands gripping the doorframe, she peered inside, scanning the interior. There was one big room, with a door off to the right that Medicine presumed led to that tower. The left of the room seemed to be a kitchen sort of area, with tables, cupboards, an oven and a sink, while the right of the room was more of a living area, with chairs, bookshelves, a fireplace, and a comfortable-looking rug.

"Aren't you going to come inside? It's cold out there."

Medicine turned to Alice, and realized that she had been standing in the doorframe for an unusually long time. As nice as the house looked, she was uncomfortable being alone in here with someone she didn't know. Still, at this point it'd be odd to remain at the door. She hesitantly stepped inside, looking around more as she did. She heard the door close behind her, which startled her, because she hadn't closed the door. Then she noticed a doll scuttle off between her legs, and realized that it had been responsible.

"Why don't you have a seat over there?" Alice asked. "I'll get started on the food. Feel free to have a look through the books if you want something to occupy you."

"This doesn't mean I trust you, you know." Medicine responded, which resulted in a puzzled look from the magician.

"Well... you aren't being forced to stay here, of course. I understand if you'd rather not. But if you do, I'll do my best to make it a hospitable stay for you," Alice responded with a bright smile. Medicine didn't feel like thinking too much about whether or not it was genuine, and so she instead opted to wander over towards the bookshelves. Most of the books were in English, and the majority of them appeared to be uninteresting - old, dull-looking novels or magical encyclopedias too far beyond her level of understanding to even begin to care about.

Just as she was starting to lose interest in the bookshelf, a small doll hovered up next to her, sliding a book into a gap. Medicine watched curiously as it hovered off to tidy up other things. There were a lot of dolls in this house going about doing chores, and Medicine had never seen anything like it. With nothing else to do at the moment, she decided to follow it and see what it did. It seemed as if its current task was to take things that were out of place and put them back - first it grabbed a cup from a table and placed it in a cupboard, and then it stopped to adjust an unevenly-placed tablecloth. Curious as to how it would react, Medicine took a candlestick and placed it on the floor. Sure enough, the doll hurriedly floated over to replace it. Medicine displaced the candle again, and got the same result. A third time, in plain sight of the doll, and yet it only continued to reposition the candlestick aimlessly, robotically.

"Are you really that stupid?" Medicine asked the doll, eyes narrowing. It seemed to detect that it was being spoken to, and stopped to look up at the taller doll. "Are you just going to let me keep doing that? Aren't you annoyed?"

The doll didn't seem to understand, tilting its head in confusion. Medicine sighed. Noticing that she was no longer speaking to it, the doll began to walk off, towards... the door at the other end of the room?

Curious again, Medicine decided to follow it. The door was open a crack, and the doll could simply slip through the small space at the edge. Pushing it open further, Medicine stepped into what appeared to be a workshop. The centerpiece of the room was a large workbench, covered in nearly-organized tools and materials. There was a strong scent of paint, most likely coming from the many cans in boxes on shelves around the room. A shelf on the other side of the room quickly caught her attention - hundreds of dolls sat in neat little rows, organized by the color of their hair and clothes. The doll youkai stepped inside, wandering towards the tiny figures to get a better look. They appeared to be inactive, and this allowed the girl to have a closer look than before. With flawless skin, smooth joints, beautiful hair, glittering glass eyes, finely stitched clothes, even tiny painted nails and the most intricate, delicate eyelashes, they were the most beautiful dolls that Medicine had ever seen, and she was in awe at the amount of detail that had went into each one. She picked up one of them, fingers drifting through its hair. It didn't react; it must have been disabled somehow. Just as she was wondering how to make it move by itself, she heard footsteps behind her, and turned around, startled.

"Oh, you found my workshop, did you?" asked Alice. She didn't seem angry at all, yet Medicine already felt anxious for having been caught wandering off. "I was wondering where you'd gotten to. Please do be careful in here, my dolls are very delicate, and everything is organized very precisely."

Medicine gazed at the doll in her hands again, then at the shelf, and then at Alice. "...You made all of these yourself?"

"Every one." Alice answered with a nod. "Making them is an enormous passion of mine. There's something... wonderful, about putting the most lifelike detail into the tiniest of figures. I've been doing it since I was a child."

"You really like dolls, then," Medicine said, and Alice nodded again. "I've never seen this many dolls in one place, I... I've never seen anybody who... cares about dolls like this, I..."

Medicine realized that she had been tearing up without realizing it. Not wanting Alice to notice, she wiped at her eyes with her hand, taking a deep breath.

"Well, that's a good thing to hear." Alice smiled. "As someone who takes great pride in her work, I'm glad it shows. Anyway, the food's ready, so would you like to come and eat?"

"Oh, um... yes. Yes, I'll eat."

Dinner, as it happened, looked really nice. It wasn't often Medicine got to have something homecooked - actually, she wasn't sure if she'd _ever_ had something homemade at all - and though she was loathe to admit it, she was actually quite excited. Most of her diet consisted of fruit or edible plants (or unfortunate humans, if they happened to wander into her field, but that was a rarity). Youkai didn't actually need to eat to survive, so any food at all was a luxury she usually lived without. Alice's stew smelled divine, and she could only assume it tasted the same. But as much as she wanted to shovel it all into her mouth, she also felt a little odd. This was the first time anybody had fed her in... ever, and it didn't feel right taking food she was offered. Medicine had lived independently for her entire existence, without relying on the usually-nonexistent generosity of others, so this was an unfamiliar change.

"I didn't poison it, you know." Alice said, taking a spoonful of her own dinner. "Though considering your abilities, maybe you'd prefer it if I did? Eat as much as you'd like, though, I really don't mind."

At that, Medicine finally decided to try the meal she was given, and her eyes widened as soon as it touched her tongue. She hadn't ever had food this nice before, and it was almost hard to imagine she wasn't dreaming at first. For a whole minute after that, she simply sat quietly taking spoonful after spoonful, relishing the flavor.

"I take it you like it?" Alice asked with a laugh. "I've never seen someone so pleased over stew."

A small hint of color rose in Medicine's cheeks, but she couldn't deny that it was really good. "Your dolls made this?"

"Well, they _helped,_ " the magician replied. "They're good for stirring, and fetching ingredients, and cleaning the dishes when you're done, but they lack the intelligence to actually know how to cook well. I've tried before, but it really doesn't turn out too edible."

"I thought they were alive, though." Medicine said with a confused look.

"Not... quite. My dolls aren't quite like you. They're material creations, saturated with enchantments to allow them to move on their own. They're quite simple-minded, though. They can perform basic tasks, but that's about it. Too many orders and it's too much for them to process, they start messing things up left and right. I don't think they actually _think_ like you and I do."

"...Oh." Medicine pondered this for a moment. It would explain why the dolls she'd seen so far seemed so... robotic. "But you still care about them, even though they're not really alive?"

"My ultimate goal is to create a doll that can think and feel, but that doesn't mean I don't care about the dolls I have. I'm not even sure if I'll ever be able to do that, anyway. I'm glad for the dolls I do have. They're my most treasured possessions, and whether you think of them as alive or not, I believe every doll deserves love and care."

Whether she meant to emphasize that or not, Alice's last words stuck with Medicine for the rest of the meal. She had begun to re-evaluate a lot of what she assumed people thought about their tools.

Later that evening, once dinner was done, the dishes were put away, the house was quiet and the sun had disappeared below the horizon, Medicine sat across from Alice on the couch, feeling more and more unwelcome with each passing second. She'd been here a few hours now, and was starting to like it - and that was the problem. She'd clearly intruded long enough, and was beginning to suspect that Alice must have been getting fed up with her by now, even if she didn't show it. Soon enough, the novelty of meeting the living doll she'd always wanted to see would wear off, and Medicine would be alone once more, feeling worse for having allowed herself to play into the fantasy of being wanted for once. It was only a matter of time until-

"It's getting quite late, are you tired at all, Medicine?"

The doll youkai was yanked out of her thoughts by Alice's sudden question. Come to think of it, she was a little sleepy. She hadn't been seriously considering staying for the night yet, but Alice's gentle tone made her rethink that. She had to admit, even with her growing doubts, not having to sleep outside for once would be... nice. Really nice.

"I... guess I'm a little bit sleepy," Medicine replied after a moment of thought. "You don't want me staying here, though, do you?" Her tone was mildly worried.

"Oh, quite the opposite, dear. If you'd like to stay the night here, that's absolutely fine. I have a guest bedroom I can set up for you. Usually I end up using that for Marisa, but I'd very much appreciate someone who wouldn't leave the room a mess in the morning-"

Alice caught herself rambling, noticing that Medicine seemed a little confused. "But yes, please do make yourself at home here, I really don't mind in the slightest."

Medicine responded with a shy nod. Though she was still feeling hesitant about taking up space in Alice's house, she had to admit that the magician was being very generous, and she was actually looking forward to having a soft bed to sleep in tonight.

Alice, it turned out, slept in the room above her workshop, accessible by a spiral staircase. A floor further above that was another room with another bed, as well as a few boxes, old dolls, knick-knacks and boxed magic supplies. The ceiling was conical, and had a little sky-light through which Medicine could see the moon in the sky.

"This used to be an attic," Alice was explaining, "but I ended up tidying up and putting a bed in here after Marisa passed out on my couch one too many times. Sometimes it's a little chillier up here, so there's an extra blanket in the corner there if you need it. And I'll be right below you if you need anything at all."

Medicine nodded in response, a shy smile creeping onto her face. She was really, _really_ looking forward to getting to sleep in such a comfortable room, and all the worry about her wellbeing was making her feel... unusually... wanted?

"Well then, goodnight. I'll see you in the morning."

"N-night," Medicine replied shyly. "G-goodnight, miss Alice."

As the magician left, shutting the door behind her, the doll youkai removed her shoes, pulled off her outer layers of clothing, and climbed underneath the sheets. The soft cotton engulfed her, and she felt more warm and comfortable than she ever had in her entire life. She let out a deep sigh of contentment, and the little doll that usually hovered by her side sank into the pillow next to her. Between the duel, the walk, and adjusting to a new environment, today had been a long and tiring day, her bed was wonderfully soft, and it didn't take Medicine a very long time to fall asleep.

* * *

 

The dark forest felt almost as if it were closing in on Medicine as she walked, and she tried to ignore the terror seeping into her bones as she followed the narrow, dimly-lit path she was walking. It was dark, and it was cold, and she was alone. She'd been here with someone else, but she didn't know where that someone-else was, and she was afraid. Shifting shapes between the trees could have been anything, and try as she might not to imagine whatever grim monsters they might be, the thoughts filled her head anyway.

She picked up her pace, determined to escape this place as quickly as possible, but the further she walked, the narrower the path got, and the thornier and scratchier the tree branches became. It was even darker now, and she was doing her best not to cry in fright. Strange nosies echoed around her, the growling and breathing and scratching of monsters in the night. A deep throbbing sound might have been the pounding footsteps of some giant beast, or perhaps the hammering of her own heart in her chest, she couldn't tell. All she wanted was to escape.

Just then, she noticed a figure off in the distance, barely illuminated by the dim moonlight, and she suddenly ran to it, calling out, but her foot snagged on a root or branch or something more terrifying, and sent her crashing to the ground. She tried to pick herself up again, but found herself totally unable to move. The noises from before grew ever-louder, and fear gripped every part of her.

"C-come back," she tried to call, "Help," but her lips didn't move, and no sound came out. She was desperate, pleading for the figure to notice her there, but they simply left, leaving her alone, unable to move, unable to scream on the dark forest floor. Whatever horrors lived here were approaching, and she was alone, alone, alone, with nobody to help her, nobody to find her. She wanted to run, but was totally paralyzed. She wanted to scream, but could not make a sound. She was alone.

* * *

 

Medicine awoke with a start, drenched in sweat, tears running down her cheeks, tiny heart pounding in her chest. Rain hammered against the roof, and the wind lashed at the side of the house, sending haunting noises through the air. She bolted upright, utterly terrified, struggling to draw breath. At the moment she'd awoken, there had been little distinction between dream and reality, and the fact that she was able to move her body took a few seconds to dawn on her. Even while slowly becoming aware of the fact that she was dreaming, Medicine didn't feel safe. It was dark, she was in an unfamiliar place, and the storm outside wasn't helping matters. She desperately wanted to escape this situation, to cling to some sort of safety, but there was nothing she could do. If any one part of her nightmare was real, always real, it was that she was alone.

...Was she?

Medicine barely knew Alice. It had been less than a day, and she still wasn't sure if Alice actually cared about her, but logical thought was beyond her at the moment. All she knew was that she was scared, and Alice was downstairs, and so she drew back her blanket and rushed down the steps, stepping out into Alice's bedroom.

"A-Alice, m, m-miss Alice-" she called, voice barely above a whisper, but it was enough to stir the magician from her slumber.

"Wh-who's..." Alice asked, before she remembered the guest she'd taken in, and sat up in bed. "Oh, Medicine. What's-" She paused, taking in the quivering girl clutching her doll companion to her chest, tears on her terrified face.

"I, I h-had, had a bad dream," Medicine answered, too terrified to care how pitiful she was making herself sound at the minute. "I, I'm scared."

"Oh, M- shh, come here, come here." She waved her hand, inviting Medicine to come over, and as soon as she was within reach, put an arm around her, brushing her fingers slowly through the girl's hair. Alice had never been a mother, or a carer, Alice had never really lived with another person at all, but did her best to do what came naturally.

The doll youkai began to whimper, unable to hold back her tears at this point. "I-it was dark, and, I w-was by myself, a-and, and-"

"Shh, don't worry." Alice interrupted. "Whatever happened isn't real. You're here, and you're safe. You're with me. Here, come here." She pulled her blanket aside, patting the empty space on her bed. With little hesitation, Medicine climbed onto the bed, and Alice drew the blanket over them both, putting a protective arm around the tsukumogami's tiny form.

"You're safe," she reiterated. "Nothing can get you here, you're safe with me. You'll be alright."

Medicine let out a shaky sigh, tucking her head into Alice's neck. It was warm, and it was nice, and she was feeling less afraid by the second surrounded by so much warmth and love. Alice noticed her breathing begin to steady, and smiled in relief.

"Try and sleep, now, alright? You'll be alright here with me."

Medicine nodded tiredly. The next few minutes were silent, punctuated with the occasional sniffle, but it was much easier to fall asleep when she was safe and protected like this. Normally she'd have concerns about putting herself in such an open position, carelessly letting her emotions spill like she was, but Medicine was too exhausted and too tired to care at this point. She was safe, surrounded by warmth and affection and safety. It was a position she had never been able to find herself in before, and she fell asleep again feeling more content than she ever had.


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, Medicine was mildly surprised to have awoken anywhere other than on her hill. Being surrounded by soft fabric instead of soft flowers was unusual, and it took a brief moment of confused remembering before she recalled yesterday's events, and she relaxed. To her left, Alice was still asleep, breathing softly. Sunlight poured in through the tiny gap between the curtains, and the sounds of birds tweeting and fairies laughing and playing were audible outside.

The doll youkai rolled over, nuzzling her face into Alice's back. She was warm, and the blankets were warm. She'd never been this close to another person for so long before, and half-expected Alice to vanish if she turned away for even a second. No matter, she might have been content enough to remain like this, warm and soft and safe forever - had her sudden movement not stirred the magician from her sleep.

"Mnn... Medi?"

"A-ah."

Medicine reflexively shrunk away from Alice, feeling a little embarrassed all of a sudden when she realized she'd been noticed. "G-good morning," she said, turning her face to hide her rosy cheeks.

"Good morning to you too." Thankfully, Alice didn't sound upset or anything. She shuffled a little, before sitting up, stretching, and giving a yawn. "Sleep well?"

Medicine nodded, sitting up in turn. "Yes. It was okay."

Before Alice even stepped out of bed, Medicine heard the clattering of little wooden feet as a troupe of dolls hurried over to bring the girl her slippers and fix the bedcovers as she got out. Once Medicine had stood up, it was only a few moments before the bed was looking nice and neat again.

Alice had moved to the vanity on the other side of the room, and was running a brush through her hair. Medicine watched for a few moments, uncomfortably aware of the silence in the room.

"Am... am I supposed to leave now?" she asked nervously, twiddling her fingers. As far as she was concerned, she'd definitely overstayed her welcome at this point. She couldn't imagine anybody wanting to keep her around this long-

"Oh? Well, of course not. We haven't even had breakfast yet, there isn't any hurry. Here, why don't you come here and let me fix your hair?"

That wasn't the answer Medicine was expecting at all, but Alice was beckoning her over, so she didn't have time to think it over. She walked across the room, noticing her disheveled appearance in the mirror. All of a sudden, Alice lifted her up, and set her on her lap, and Medicine was so startled that words briefly escaped her. As the magician's fingers started to trail through her hair, however, all of her worries vanished. Though her expertise may have been dolls, the real magic, Medicine learned, came with her use of a brush. The doll youkai practically melted into Alice's lap as she worked on her hair. Having somebody fuss over her like this was a completely alien experience, and it was so wonderful and new that she had been utterly quiet the entire time.

"You have such pretty hair, you know," Alice said as she worked the brush through Medicine's curls. "So light and curly and soft."

"I d-do?" Medicine replied, eyes wide and face red.

"Oh, you do, you're beautiful, really. Although I suppose that's to be expected of a youkai doll, isn't it?" She laughed, and Medicine was left with an odd, fuzzy feeling she'd never felt before.

She sat dreamily until Alice was finished, and snapped back into alertness when she stopped. Then she caught her reflection in the mirror, and noticed Alice was finished. She was stunned by her own appearance; she'd never been able to make her own hair look this nice, and Alice had done wonders on her. It was almost hard to realize that the reflection she was seeing was herself, the same herself she saw when she gazed into a puddle, except instead of hate and despair and dirt it was wonder and beauty and joy-

"Medicine?"

"Huh?"

"I asked if you wanted something to eat."

"Oh, um... it's... okay if I do?"

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?"

"Oh, well... sure. That'd be nice."

Breakfast in Alice's house, like dinner, was also prepared partially by dolls. As they set the table and scurried around helping with the food, she watched in wonderment. Each of them was so devoted to their duties, and yet their lack of autonomy was also a little disturbing. Did they work because they wanted to, or because they were made to? Medicine really didn't know how to feel about Alice. She'd never seen someone so devoted to dolls - never even thought someone like that could exist - and yet at the same time, she wasn't sure if the dolls were happy.

"Is something the matter?"

"Huh? Why?"

"No reason, really. You just seemed a little quiet, and your expression looked odd."

"Oh, I'm fine." Medicine tore her eyes away from the dolls and back to Alice. "Is the food going to be ready soon?"

"Yes, I'm just finishing the eggs, it shouldn't be long."

Alice had made a lot of food, Medicine noted as she placed it at the table. Bread and eggs and sausages and bacon and beans, butter and cheese for the bread, milk to drink. It was more food than she'd ever seen before, and her mouth was watering at the sight alone.

"You look stunned," Alice pointed out with a little giggle. "Not used to food like this? Marisa always says I should eat Japanese food like a normal person, but this is the sort of thing my... mother would usually make."

"I'm not used to eating _anything,"_ Medicine replied, eyes wide.

The answer took Alice by surprise, but she laughed after a moment. "Well, there'll be plenty from now on, so don't you worry. Eat up!"

The food was _good,_ Alice and her dolls were _great_ at cooking and it showed. While youkai didn't technically need to eat, it was a luxury Medicine often went without, and she savored every bite of it. Even still, she ended up finishing before Alice. Feeling somewhat awkward sitting there with nothing to do, she spoke up.

"Should... should I go _now?"_

"Is there something you need to do?" Alice asked, expression somewhat worried.

"N-no, I've just... haven't I been in your house for a really long time?"

Alice gave a gentle sigh. "Don't worry, I understand. Nobody likes feeling as if they're intruding. But really, you're welcome here. You're a sweet, polite girl, and it's been a pleasure having you here. There's nothing to be worried about, you're welcome to stay."

"F...forever?" Medicine hesitantly asked.

The puppeteer laughed. "That isn't a decision you have right away, don't worry. For now, I have something you might be interested in seeing."

"What is it?"

"Would you like to watch me make some dolls?"

Medicine's eyes widened. Alice's magical dolls were probably the most interesting thing about her, and she was extremely curious about how they were made and how they worked, so the question alone was enough to get her excited. "R-really? You're going to make some?"

"Yes, it's something I have to do quite often. Sometimes they need repaired, or replaced, or just go missing for reasons I have yet to discover. I wouldn't be surprised if it was Marisa. Honestly, though, I simply enjoy making them. I don't usually have company while I work, but it'd be nice, I'm sure. Come on, my workshop is this way."

As they left the table, Medicine noticed a group of dolls begin to clean up the mess. Something had bothered her a little, though - despite the nice breakfast the dolls had made, and the hard work they did cleaning up, Alice had never once thanked them. Uneasily, she followed Alice into her workshop.


	4. Chapter 4

Alice's workshop was easily the most impressive thing Medicine had ever seen, and her stunned silence as soon as Alice brought her inside was a testament to that. The walls were lined with shelves full of parts, wooden arms and legs and heads and bodies, tiny glass eyes in jars, boxes full of small, silky-looking wigs that could have been real hair. (Or maybe they were?) Jars of paint and lacquer and other things the girl didn't even recognize sat all over her desk, sewing supplies and dozens of spools of different types of string and yarn and tiny items of clothing, ribbons and dresses and tiny socks and shoes. Some of the shelves had even stranger items that Medicine couldn't imagine had anything to do with dollmaking, shiny bits of metal, jars of oddly-colored liquid, herbs and powders and strange-looking apparatus.

Her smile only faded when she turned around and noticed the last shelf by the door - lining it were incomplete dolls, missing arms or legs or eyes or hair or clothes, sitting totally still, looking incredibly sad and lifeless. Some had fallen over into unceremonious positions. Medicine took a few hesitant steps towards the shelf, feeling something somber and morbid in her chest, but froze when Alice spoke up.

"Here, Medicine. I'm going to be starting, wouldn't you like to see?" The magician was smiling, holding a few doll parts, and the doll youkai briefly forgot her reservations, hurrying over to the workbench.

"Are those going to be a doll?" Medicine asked, glancing at the collection of parts Alice had set on the table."

"Yes, they are." Alice answered, scooping up the tiny wooden torso and beginning to click the arms and legs into place. "I usually make the individual pieces in bulk, and so putting them together doesn't take particularly long. This way, I can also scavenge pieces from destroyed dolls, so they don't go to waste."

The way Alice so nonchalantly admitted to cannibalizing dolls for parts made Medicine shiver a little. The magician spoke of the process with a hint of pride, and though Medicicine could see her point, she also felt something a little uneasy in her stomach.

"Once all the parts have been attached to the torso, I have the basic frame. Do you see?" Alice gently presented the unfinished doll for Medicine to see.

"Does... that one have any re-used parts?" Medicine asked worriedly.

"This one? No, everything's new. I just finished painting these arms yesterday, in fact."

Medicine's attention turned to the doll's hands, which she noticed were fully articulated, five fingers with all the same joints she had on her own hands. The fingers couldn't have been any longer than a centimeter or two, and yet the amount of detail Alice had put into them was unbelievable. Each finger even had a little carved-out nail that was a slightly different color than the rest.

"The hands look so real," the girl gasped in amazement.

"Thank you," Alice said, feeling a bit of pride. "I try my best to bring out as much of a real girl in them as I can."

"But... she doesn't have eyes."

"Ah, silly, that's the next step. Eyes and hair for the head. This is a Shanghai doll, so she gets blue eyes and long, blonde hair."

"Shanghai?" Medicine asked. "What does that mean?"

"I make many different types of dolls," Alive answered. "Shanghai dolls are the most basic, and easiest to make and enchant."

"...Enchant?"

"Aha, just you wait and see, now." Alice's voice sounded a little teasing, and Medicine grew even more curious.

Alice added two tiny glass eyes into the indentation in the doll's forehead. She then reached for one of the little doll wigs, which Medicine noticed had a net of sorts holding it together underneath. Alice applied a bit of glue to the net, and placed it onto the doll's head. You could barely even tell that it was a wig at this point; the hair may as well have been growing out of the wood. Medicine reached a hand out to touch it, but Alice pulled the doll away.

"Ah-ah, the glue hasn't dried yet. You wouldn't want to touch it yet."

"O-oh, okay." Medicine replied, a hint of embarrassment in her voice. "How long does it take to dry?"

"Only a few minutes." Alice said, and pulled out a drawer on her desk. "While we wait, I'll gather up the clothes she'll wear."

"Ooooh..." Medicine watched as Alice gathered a white shirt and black dress, a tiny apron, even tiner shoes and socks, and a bright red ribbon.

"Ah, ah, those are so cute..." the girl gasped as Alice set them out nearly on the desk. "They'll make her look cute!"

"Yes, I'm sure they will." Alice agreed. She began to carefully dress the doll, saving the ribbon for last, once the glue had dried. "There, all finished. What do you think?"

Medicine stared at the doll on the table. It was certainly of the same quality as Alice's other dolls, but it looked strange, just sitting there alone, unmoving.

"Is it okay?" Medicine asked. "She isn't moving. She looks sad."

"Ah, well that's because I haven't enchanted it yet," Alice answered.

"You said that before, what does it mean?"

"Well, lucky for you, it's time to find out!" Alice replied with a bright smile. "Enchantment is the process of putting magical energy into an object, so that the object itself becomes magical. You could enchant a sword to burn its target, or a door so that it only opens when touched by its owner. Different magicians use it for different things, but I use a very special kind of enchantment - animation. With magic, I bring my dolls to life, allowing them to move about and take orders."

Medicine was quiet for the explanation, but once Alice finished it seemed she had multiple questions to ask at once.

"How do- Are they- What do-" A breath, and a moment of thought. "How do you make them enchanted?"

"Here, I'll show you."

Alice stood up, and went and retrieved one of the strange pieces of equipment Medicine had noticed earlier. It was some sort of circular frame, made of brass, with little dish-shaped receptacles poking out of it. Alice placed the unenchanted doll in the center, spacing out its limbs. She then began to sort through jars of ingredients, placing herbs and minerals and other strange substances into the dishes, mixing and mashing them occasionally.

"What are you putting all of that stuff in there for?" Medicine asked.

"Different materials have different magical properties," Alice answered. "Iron and bone meal, for example, provide the dolls with strength. The plants and fungi that grow in the forest store magical energy, which helps to boost the dolls' ability to fight with magic. And cinnabar, water and blood are the essentials for making them animate and able to think."

Medicine wasn't sure whether it'd be more or less creepy if the blood wasn't Alice's own, so she neglected to ask.

"In the end, the variety of enchantments make each doll a unique and special creation, with a lot of capability. For different types, I use different magic. Some have higher levels of autonomy, for example, but are more costly to make. Others are built to be waterproof, or flame-retardant, and of course, gunpowder and fire elemental enhancements are the key components of my explosive dolls. Then there's my special project, the Goliath..."

Medicine hated to be reminded of the thought of exploding dolls. It still shocked her that someone who cared about her dolls as much as Alice could be so eager to waste them. In fact, a _lot_ of the things Alice did didn't seem to make a lot of sense, and it had been bothering her since the moment she came here.

"You... you _do_ love them, don't you?" Medicine asked, worriedly. Her strange tone of voice got Alice's attention, and she froze part-way through crushing some sort of stone.

"Well of course. It is, after all, my lifelong craft." The magician frowned. "Is something wrong, Medicine?"

"I... I don't understand you." the doll youkai muttered.

"H-huh?"

"I don't understand you!" Medicine's voice had risen quite a bit, and Alice was clearly shocked.

"You put so much effort into making them, you have so many of them, you so clearly love them so much and yet, y-yet-" she pointed to the shelf of unfinished dolls, "-you don't even finish all of them! And you make them explode, and do your chores and you don't even _thank_ them, and-"

The girl took a shaky breath, fists clenched. "I th-thought that if I stayed with you I'd understand everything, but you're - you're just - I don't understand you! I, I can't-"

"M-Medicine!?" Alice asked worriedly - Medicine was halfway to the door at this point. The magician reached out a hand, about to ask her to wait, but the motion only made her retreat even further.

"S-stop! I don't know what to do anymore! L-leave me alone!"

Alice stood up, but by then Medicine had already fled the room. She hurriedly followed after the girl, but by the time she got to the front door, she already appeared to have ran off. The magician felt a deep sinking feeling quickly growing in her chest. Whatever had happened to make her so uncomfortable, she'd clearly been the cause of it, and now it seemed it was her responsibility to make things right.

With only a moment more of hesitation, Alice left to make her way into the forest.


	5. Chapter 5

Finding Medicine wasn't as hard as Alice had imagined it was going to be - the path from her house was relatively linear, and came to a natural stop at a mushroom-filled clearing. Alice had made for the spot with a small entourage of dolls. The fungi here could grow to colossal sizes, and sure enough, Alice spotted the doll youkai perched on a massive toadstool.

"Medicine!" she exclaimed worriedly. "There you are!"

However, Medicine didn't so much as turn her head in response.

"I _said_ I don't want to _talk_ to you."

Following the tsukumogami's rather curt reply came a barrage of danmaku, forcing Alice to double back to avoid getting hit. Though there was anger in her voice, it was easy to make out a pained, dejected tone as well. The threat only made Alice more worried, and she called again.

"Whatever is the matter? You ran off in such a hurry, I-"

"Go _away!"_

It seemed the girl was in no mood to listen - the resounding boom of a spell card activation made that clear, and Alice tensed up in anticipation. Soon enough, the air became filled with a toxic haze and purple bullets glowing like stars in the mist, deadly in their beauty. The hazardous maelstrom began to quickly fill the clearing, forcing Alice into a quick decision.

 _"Whirlwind Formation,"_ she ordered her dolls, and they quickly formed a circle around Alice, drawing their various weapons. They began to pace around her in a circular motion, faster and faster until a spiral of wind had surrounded her. With a burst of power, the dolls sent a cyclone flying outwards, clearing the air.

"Medicine!"

"Why are you so _persistent!?"_

Rather than continue to fight, the youkai hopped down from the mushroom she was standing on, and ran off in the other direction. As Alice followed, she asked herself the same question. It wasn't as if this girl was her responsibility. It was a wild youkai among hundreds, and had little to do with her established routine, doll youkai though she was. Was it really only eager interest that drove her forward?

She remembered the night she'd spent keeping the girl safe and warm in her bed during that night's storm, and realized that no, it was _responsibility._ Something she'd never known before, not in this way, but something that was quite clear now. Was this what Shinki-sama had meant when--

Distracted, Alice had almost failed to notice a poison trap left on the path, and narrowly avoided stumbling into what presumably would have been a very unpleasant experience. Medicine wasn't far ahead, Alice noticed - she was much taller, and had an advantage in terms of speed.

"Medicine, please! Let's talk for just one moment!"

_"No!"_

Following Medicine's reply came another wave of bullets, which Alice had no choice but to dodge while trapped in the narrow forest path. It would have been a trivial matter to settle this battle - Alice's magic was more than a match for this young youkai's strength - but she had no desire to attack Medicine today.

She continued to chase the girl through the forest, and eventually her attacks became less and less intense. Eventually, when the path came to a sudden stop at a riverbank, and it was impossible to go any further, Medicine stopped, and sank to the ground. She was no longer attacking, though Alice wasn't any less worried. She hesitantly approached where the girl was sitting, and this time she made no attempt to drive Alice away. Alice assumed this meant she'd settled down, and quietly sat down next to her. Her head was buried in her knees, but the quiet sound of sniffles was all Alice needed to know she was crying.

"Do you want to tell me what's the matter?" Alice asked after a brief moment of quiet.

"...I've seen this before," came Medicine's slightly choked answer.

"Seen... what do you mean?"

The magician put a gentle hand on Medicine's back, but the girl pushed her arm away as soon as she felt it, withdrawing from the touch.

"I'm not going to forget so easily. There was once s-someone who said she loved me. Played with me, c-carried me around, always by my side. And then th-threw me away, left me alone. I was alone, for a hundred long years I was alone, and when I woke up I saw the truth."

"M-Medicine--"

"That I was a monster. A monster nobody wanted. I was stupid, stupid stupid to think that you cared. I wanted to believe, but I hurt myself again. I saw everything. You'll throw me away as soon as you're done with me, like you threw away your other dolls. Because I'm just a toy to you. I was only ever a toy to her, and that's all I am to you - another toy. And I know how that goes."

The girl turned her gaze to Alice, and the magician was taken aback by her gaze - filled with more venom than her attacks, an expression that could only be carved by a century of festering hate, and Alice felt her heart cleave in two.

"M-Medicine, that's--"

The weight of the youkai's words had stunned Alice into silence, and now more than ever she had no idea what to say. She hadn't ever stopped to consider that what she did or didn't do with her dolls probably meant far more to an abandoned doll youkai than it ever would to her. Her actions - or lack thereof - had spoken far more loudly than her words of kindness, and it was only too late she was realizing this.

"I... I'd never imagined-- a hundred years is longer than I'd ever be able to consider, I-- I couldn't have- I should have-"

A breath, a sigh, and,

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cause you so much worry."

Medicine gave Alice a curious look, but said nothing.

"Your- what you're worrying about, I promise it isn't true. Perhaps when I met you, yes, it was only mere curiosity that led me to invite you to my house, but the more I talked to you the more I realized that you were far more than just an interesting doll - you're sweet, and you're kind, and you've suffered far, far more than you ever should have. I should have considered- I never meant to add to that."

"S-stop."

"Stop- stop what?"

"S-stop m-making me, m-m-maki-ing, me, h-hope--"

Medicine's lip was quivering so much that she could barely finish her sentence. Tears were pooling in her eyes, and she made a futile attempt to wipe them away with a shaking hand. When Alice touched her shoulder, it was too much. The dam burst, and she erupted into sobs, falling into the magician's side. Alice took the girl in her arms, holding her softly as she cried, both worried for her sake and relieved that she'd stopped shutting her out.

"S-shh, there, there-"

Alice had never really thought she had what it took to be a mother. In fact, she barely had the skills to cope with other people, spending most of her time secluded in a hostile forest. And yet here, she found herself mirroring the motions she remembered from long ago, cradled in the arms of the goddess of Makai.

"Shhh, don't cry. What I said before - what I said then, I meant it. You're safe with me. You always will be. I have no intention of ever leaving you behind, no matter what you may worry about."

"Y-you mean it?"

"I mean it."

Medicine took a long, quavering breath, and nodded, pressing her face into Alice's chest. Alice continued to gently run her hand up and down the girl's back, holding her until she began to calm.

"I, I just..." Medicine said, "...I thought everything w-would be better if I stayed with you. Y-you were nice to me - and no one's _ever_ nice to me - and I th-thought maybe things wouldn't be as b-bad, but-"

She paused to take a shaky breath. "But ever since I came to your house I've only been confused. I-I never thought _anybody_ could like dolls as much as you and I was so excited because for the first time someone might have-- but, b-but then you had more that you just throw away, a-and they do your work for you and you don't say thank you even after they t-try so hard for you, and- and I began to think that maybe you didn't care, but now this, and... and I just don't know! Do you like them or not!"

She looked up at Alice, desperate for any kind of answer. "Do you like me? I don't understand."

"...You know, I've been asking myself the same question."

"W-what?" Medicine asked, worry in her voice.

"Well, you're right, you know. I don't think I've been showing my dolls the love they deserve. I'd never really considered how much they do for me. I've simply fallen into a routine, and never really questioned it until now. I hadn't thought about the dolls that get shelved, nor the ones I send into battle to sacrifice themselves. Not until you came along."

"Me?"

"You. And quite honestly, that was the most difficult thought. You're unlike any doll I've ever dealt with before, and I was never really quite certain what that meant. When I first met you, on that hill - I thought of you as a doll. A highly advanced and articulate one, but a doll. But then it became clear that you're far more than that - and I had to consider that maybe I'd been thinking about my craft the wrong way. And about you."

The doll youkai tilted her head - evidently, some of this explanation was beyond her, but she seemed to get the gist of it. "And what do you think...?"

Alice paused to consider that, and then answered, "I think you're someone very special. Certainly someone whose sweetness surprised me. Someone I wouldn't mind having in my home, caring for, or loving."

Medicine's eyes widened, and Alice smiled.

"Y-you think that about me? For real? D-do..." A shy pause, "Would you say... D-do... you l-love me?"

"...I guess I do. I may have gotten to know you rather quickly, but that's something I don't think is very hard to say."

Medicine stared breathlessly at Alice, a feeling she'd never known rising up in her chest. She wasn't sure what to do about it, but her attention was torn away when a light drop of water fell on her head - and then another, and then a few more. By the look of it, the rain was starting up.

"A-ah, I'm getting wet."

"Oh. Come on, then, why don't we head back home? I'm sure the doll I was working on must be getting lonely, and we wouldn't want to leave a nice doll by herself, would we? Maybe we can do something about the ones on the shelf, too."

Medicine lit up with a surprised look - but then smiled, and nodded. "Okay."

Alice had never really thought she'd had the makings of a mother, but seeing the bright expression on Medicine's face, she decided that, if that's what she had become over the past few days, then it wasn't something she very much minded at all.

Hand-in-hand, the two made their way back home, and more than one doll found a new home and a new chance that day.


End file.
